Survival Mode

It's been just over 2 weeks since Avery made her grand entrance. The first week was spent in a blissful zombie-like state. Mom was here, meals were brought in, and I was living in a protective bubble and recuperating from giving birth and the ensuing aftermath.

Nursing hurts. I'm just sayin'.

Week 2 began and the wind of reality came blowing in. Postpartum survival mode kicked in and that's where we are today. Experiencing this for the fifth time, I've realized that postpartum survival is pretty much the same for me now as it has been every round. The same challenges are there and the way I react to those challenges is predictable. The only things that have evolved over time are my methods of coping. When I'm not in tears, overwhelmed by the sheer enormity of my task as a mother, and after my "grumpy hour" each morning after I get up, I'd like to think that these survival methods are at least keeping me sane.

Amazing Postpartum Survival Secrets of a Super Mom

My favorite fashion blogger, Reachel Bagley of Cardigan Empire, describes the postpartum period as the "Spa Weeks." I concur! After sacrificing your body for 9 months, only to have it ravaged by the birthing/breastfeeding process, then taken over by a nursing infant who rarely leaves your arms, every woman deserves a strong dose of "me time" and pampering. The physical, mental, and emotional demands of a new baby are difficult enough, and these are joined by brutal hormones and a radically changed and deflated body. All of these extra forces are at war with a woman's emotional stability and self-image, thus requiring extra attention and self-care to fight back!

Shower Every Day - I don't wash my hair every day, but the rest of me just lives for that hot shower every morning (afternoon?!). I turn a movie on for the kids every day, so I can shower and get ready. That way there's less of a chance that they'll get into trouble, or worse, come in and interrupt my "me time!" Baby, of course, must be sleeping or happy enough to join me in the bathroom.

Get Dressed - No pajamas allowed! I prefer actual jeans or pants and a nice top. I wear my maternity pants if nothing else fits, but I avoid sweats and t-shirts because they make me feel sloppy and unpresentable. It doesn't matter that I'm not going anywhere that day. What matters is how I feel about myself. I've also learned over time how to best dress my postpartum body and to de-emphasize the trouble areas. Again, Cardigan Empire - thank you!

Style Your Hair - The days that I manage to get my hair completely curled and styled are good days indeed. But even if that doesn't happen, a ponytail can be dressed up with a few curls and even a messy-bun can me glam with a sleek part in the front or a cute hair accessory.

Put On Some Makeup - Now is not the time to be skipping the makeup! After my first (sleepless) night at home with this baby I looked in the mirror in the morning and was shocked and dismayed by my haggard appearance. Dark under-eye circles, the hormone-induced acne plague, and water-retention puffiness all combined for a truly scary image. Had I left myself in that condition I would have been in tears by noon. So I try to stick with at least my two makeup musts: mascara and concealer/foundation. Anything beyond that deserves bonus points!

Pick at Least Two Extras - This is where the pampering comes in. I may not leave my house all day, but a few spritzes of my favorite perfume make me feel pretty and womanly. A pair of earrings or a glitzy necklace make me feel put together, and putting on lipstick to go pick up Dallin from Kindergarten is 30 seconds well spent.

I know I'm placing a lot of emphasis on appearance, but that is one thing that really helps me. There are a lot of more practical things that I try to emphasize as well:

Drink a lot of water

Take naps - it CAN be done! Unplug the phone, put on a movie for the other kids, whatever it takes!

Eat healthy, but don't skip the ice cream

Stretch (Sorry, no exercising allowed for weeks still! I'm not THAT super mom!)

Go to the chiropractor - I get all out of whack from nursing and holding the baby all the time and the tension headaches get bad.

Keep the kitchen counter and sink clean - the rest of the house may be in chaos, but if and when I get this done it really improves my serenity.

Watch A&E's "Pride and Prejudice"

Don't forget to feed your spirit:

Pray

Read your scriptures (reciting one verse of scripture mastery before bed absolutely counts)

Have FHE and family prayers (put hubby in charge)

And lastly: Allow yourself a break! I have to tell myself every day, "You JUST had a baby!" I try to ignore the messy house and forgive myself for being exhausted and therefore sometimes impatient and grouchy. I try to allow myself to take it easy, to sit around and be "lazy" and watch movies or read a book all afternoon if I want to! I also love to give my family the opportunity to serve: i.e. when they're your own children it is NOT slave labor!

Postpartum survival is as much a part of childbirth as labor and delivery, and often much more challenging. We can only do our best, but we can be at our best by taking care of ourselves first. The Lord will fill in the rest; He does for me. The service I receive daily from my husband and children is such a blessing, and the friends and family who also serve and care for me and my family are my salvation. It's not easy, but conquering this challenge of motherhood is so empowering!